I have had a difficult time accepting any sort of compliment for as long as I can
remember. I never viewed myself the way that other people do. I have always been a hard worker and put everyone else above myself because I was told that everyone else was more important than I am when I was growing up. Let’s just say that I didn’t have the best childhood. I was constantly compared to other people around me. I was never good enough for my “father” and “stepmom.” My siblings were more valuable to them than I was. I was the oldest. I was told I was too dumb to be able to do what I wanted to when I grew up. I met some people who helped me get out of that situation and into a better one.
By this time, the damage was already done. I was beaten down and struggled with my self worth and image. Even though my now husband told me for all of these years that I am worth it and I am beautiful, I never saw it. I still struggled with his compliments.
I got brave one day and decided that for our anniversary I would do something I have never done before. I booked a consultation for a session. Going into my session, I was nervous. I have always been one to keep to myself and not show too much emotion to other people. Very few people see that side of me. I went and did the session with Erika and I’m pretty sure I made her nervous when she showed me sneak peaks throughout my session. I never said much and didn’t show much emotion when looking at them. I didn’t believe that it could have been me. But there was no one else in the room, it had to be me. I just had a hard time swallowing it that those images were of me.
I took my husband to my reveal so that he could see the images and choose the ones he wanted. By the end of my reveal, I was ecstatic to see the images and the thought still crossed my mind that they were not of me. I knew they were but it took a minute for my mind to wrap around the thought.
We ended up purchasing a larger package because I couldn’t decide what ones I didn’t want. After my session and reveal, my confidence had been boosted some because I knew that I could be seen the way that my husband sees me. I knew I was worthy of myself and of others.
It is an experience that I wish every woman would have. It is worth it and so are all women. We all deserve to see ourselves for what we are.
